we’re number 2! we’re number 2!

Last week saw yet another meeting between the U.S. Mens National team in a “friendly” (I believe there is no such thing as a friendly. Especially not between the U.S. and Mexico. And especially not when this happens.) with the national team of Mexico. The two played to a 2-2 draw, with every blog in cyberspace being quick to point out that a draw is not a loss, and therefore our unbeaten streak remains intact.


That game has been dissected to death, so I’m not about to reiterate what has already been said a dozen times over. On the contrary, this post is far more self-serving.

In honor of the match, last week on SBI Ives held yet another of his “You Write the Caption” contests about this picture of USMNT/NJ Red Bulls rookie Jozy Altidore schooling Mexico/Barça defender Rafael Marquez in the US/Mexico friendly last Wednesday.

Today, he posted the top ten submitted captions:

10. Ayuda! He caído y no puedo levantarme! (Help me. I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.) (JD)
9. Rafa Marquez finds a very interesting way to shine Jozy’s shoes (Dave Martinez)
8. “Mr. Marquez, I really enjoy watching Barcelona, now excuse me while I blow by you and score!” (Golden Child)
7. Rafa tests out the new Tempurpedic turf in Houston (Mark)
6. “Jozy be like “unnnhhhh.” And Rafa be like “whaaaaaaaaaa”?” (Kyonk)
5. Appalled by the new USMNT’s jerseys, Rafael Marquez shields his eyes, causing him to lose his footing. (Dan)
4. 08/09 Altidore Jersey $82.95
08/09 Marquez Jersey $89.95
Nike Football $119.95
Leaving Mexico’s best defender on his ass…PRICELESS. (Rich)
3. This is Jozy Altidore. This is Jozy Altidore knocking a world class defender to the turf like a little bitch. Any questions? (Mark)
2. Bob Bradley: “Sweep the leg Jozy.”
      Onyewu: “Put him in a body bag, yeah!” (Arriaga)
And the No. 1 caption submitted by you, the SBI readers, for the Jozy Altidore/Rafa Marquez photo is:
1. “I am Jozy Altidore and this is my story. “When I was a teenager I kicked the ball too hard and my parents were afraid I would hurt the Mexican national team.”
Impossible Is Nothing (CD)
Thanks to all of you who participated and be sure to check in for the next episode of You Write the Caption.

As you can see, keeping in line with the 2 theme (second friendly, 2-2 scoreline, etc.) yours truly took a respectable second place out of literally tens of entries. I don’t think you realize how difficult it is to shoot for second place. To be funny enough that you beat out everyone else, but just unfunny enough that you let a single person slide by you to win. It takes incredible skill and finesse. And really, since it’s harder than coming in first, by my logic, it’s better than coming in first.

No, really. It is.


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